| | The X-Box at the local EB was actually working. Halo was running. Two guys were playing together, kind of neat to have co-op play in there. They were running through dim blue-grey hallways, general look reminded me of Bungie's earlier shooter Marathon: techie, flat colors, cold, dull. Most of the textures looked surprisingly low detail but maybe it was just that they were boring.
I checked out the PC section (looking for SamSho2) and found myself meandering close to the X-Box. The guy on the left controller departed so I picked it up.
The analog sticks weren't too bad for this game, with a lot of give and smooth motion, plus a fairly long stick. Bungie smartly didn't use the little rocklike face buttons for any real action functions--I think I pressed X once and it did something dull like reloading.
After swirling around a bit and then figuring out how to aim I see a guy running around with a big green inverted triangle over his head.
Me: "Is that you?"
Guy: "Yeah."
Whee. So I trundle after him around the dim blue grey corridors. My gun is similar to the surroundings: flat, dull, some little bright spots. It goes "pud pud pud" lazily when I fire. Bored, I fire a burst across guy's shoulders.
Guy: "Hey watch your fire."
Fah. So I follow him some more. There were some floating things that fired lasers around us but they were supposed to be on our side so I couldn't shoot them. :P Eventually I realize that it's not just that all the areas look alike: we're going in circles.
Me: "What are we looking for?"
Guy: "A blue light."
I spot a blue light on some sort of device on the floor in a corridor.
Me: "Here's a blue light."
Guy: "A moving blue light."
Oh hell. More wandering around. Impetuously, I run ahead. I'm actually pulling away from the guy.
Me: "Hey, I can run faster than you."
Guy: Realizes his finger had relaxed on the analog stick, probably due to boredom or some sort of glandular disorder.
Me: Disappointed, realize we do indeed move at actually the same speed when both holding the stick forward. Sheds tear over moment of lost glory.
Boredom Lad keeps managing to find bigger weapons, like a rocket launcher that obscures half the screen (ala Marathon). Strangely, none of them do anything that exciting. All I seem to be running across is more ammo for my barely automatic pud gun. Hey, Boredom Lad is switching weapons as he runs along ahead of me. Maybe left trigger does that...
Me: Lobs grenade forward at the guy. Oh yeah, that button throws grenades. Oh well.
Me: "Oops. Watch it!"
Grenade: Boom.
Guy: "Oh."
Me: Contains some disappointment that grenade didn't splatter my dear comrade, and tries for revenge by aiming forward at him and pressing X...
Me: Reloads pud gun. Sense of disappointment now nearly overpowering.
Eventually we find the correct blue light. It floats and seems to be some sort of robot because there's this shrill digital voice babbling to itself when we're near it. It floats off and my partner follows it. I trail along afterwards. Oh, I almost forgot: we do a bit of fighting now and then. I use the term loosely because finding slow-moving little spore creatures and slow-moving zombies (plant creatures maybe but they're slow, humanoid, ugly and clumsy, which pretty much makes them zombies in my book) lurching toward me from time to time doesn't really feel like being under attack. A little pud-dling in their direction seems to make them disappear.
The babbling blue light has stopped high up on the wall ahead.
Guy: "Ready for some fun?"
Me: Oh, you mean this is a game played for amusement? About freakin' time...
On the verge of excitement I pick up a nearby health kit. You know, the white box with the red cross. Now I'm ready. Bring it on!
Hum. More spores and zombies. They keep coming this time so I guess this is fun. I spend most of the time looking up at the ceiling as I keep getting the analog sticks mixed up when trying to backpedal. Eventually I find I've backed into a corner with spores, zombies and Mr. Charisma in front of me. Greased Lighting has managed to get himself surrounded by creatures who couldn't outpace a slug.
Me: Fires the pud-gun, sort of vaguely trying to aim a bit to the side of Mr. Charisma.
Spores and Zombies: poof... slosh... poof
Mr. Charisma: "Oh, they got me."
Me: Rush of evil satisfaction as I imagine it could have been one of my "stray" shots that took him down.
My glimmer of momentary fun was shortlived however. Now all the poofters shamble toward me. I pud them to non-existence while cleverly sidestepping and circling like a wildebeast with turning disease, and shortly find myself with nothing left to do. The blue light special flew into a tube a while back with a parting "fwee!" Blue dimness surrounds me. I wander aimlessly for about ten seconds before dropping the controls. Re-awakened to the world of the living I go purchase Skies of Arcadia.
On my way out I see that Greased Lightning has respawned and some other guy is manning the left controller. They're still in dim blue halls.
Later guys. Have a blast. |
|
|