Posted by exodus on November 23, 2023 at 18:39:39 EST in reply to It's not that I don't wander, but my core goes along for the ride. I guess what I mean is my core self, the person that's been in here since I was probably 7 or 8 years old, sticks around no matter the situation I'm in. Though I have of course evolved over time to accept more parts of the world, and more of other people's experiences, my sense of self remains pretty strong.
Sometimes I don't feel like myself, but that tends to be either physical or "altered state" (illness, stress, tiredness) related. But even in those scenarios I know what "myself" feels like, and can eventually return to it. But maybe things would be different if I were cut off from the capacity to define myself. A friend of mine had a stroke, and his sense of self got a bit scattered as a result, and I'm not sure how I'd deal with that. (n/t) from exodus.
I guess it sounds from your original post like part of your self definition was defined by an inevitable death of a certain kind, though that surprises me a bit. I tend to deal with death when it happens in its time but not spend a lot of time preparing for it, because that's just not really what I value. I guess if I were faced with it directly (terminal illness etc) I'd have to spend a lot of my time on that, and I hope that's not the scenario you're facing - but until that day I don't want to define myself by the end so much as the present, of course.
n/t
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